Annie, you’ve always been rather edgy and experimental, and on the front lines of the sexual revolution. What prompted you to write a mainstream book?
In my three decades of exploring various arenas of sexuality, I’ve found that people in all walks of life are befuddled by sex and dissatisfied with their sex lives. Most people don’t reach any where near their potential for sexual enjoyment. Meanwhile, I’ve discovered that virtually anyone can create a spectacular sex life, relatively easily. I care about people, and I want to see as many people as possible become more confidant, skilled and satisfied, which in turn would make for a much happier world.
What qualifies you as a sex expert?
There are very few women on the planet that have had the wide scope of sexual experience that I have. Learning about love, sex and orgasm has been my passionate mission in life.
First, I was a sex worker for twenty years, in which time I had sex with thousands of people of all types, in a wide variety of ways. I then did a lot of sex experiments through performance art, such as an onstage ‘sex magic masturbation ritual to evoke the legend of the sacred prostitute.’ I traveled the world studying ancient sex techniques and the spiritual side of sex. I went on to learn the academic part, and earned a Ph.D. in human sexuality. I’ve since taught a quadrillion sex workshops. I’ve been doing sex life makeovers for singles and couples the past few years, and that has been very enlightening.
Throughout, I’ve had magnificent ups as well as some very challenging downs. I’m fifty years old now and my sex life is far better than ever before, because I’ve learned exactly how to make it that way—and keep it that way. I love sharing what I’ve learned.
Who is Spectacular Sex for?
It’s for people in both red states and blue states! It’s for absolutely anyone who wants to have a more spectacular sex life, needs a bit of inspiration, or wants to learn more about sex. It’s great for beginners, intermediates, and the sexually advanced. It’s for men, women, straight, gay, bi, trans, vanilla, kinky—even celibates. Everyone can benefit from my sex life makeover center.
Who needs a sex life makeover?
From what I’ve seen, most folks could stand to make some improvements. Some folks need a mini- touch up makeover and others need an XXX-treme overhaul makeover. The truth is, our sex lives are fluid—constantly evolving. What worked for you before might not work for you any more. If we don’t honor these changes, sex becomes stale.
What exactly is ‘spectacular sex?’
The only answer to that question is, ‘it depends!’ That’s like asking, What is a spectacular LIFE? People are all so different, and there is no single way that works for everyone. So I help people create a sex life that’s tailored to their lifestyle and their desires—to who they are.
In general though, spectacular sex is sex that goes beyond the physical ins and outs. It’s awakening your full erotic power, knowing how to harness your sexual energy, and feeling good about your body. It’s deeply nourishing sex that creates a sense of well-being. It’s sex that communicates what you deeply feel and desire. Sometimes it’s deeply emotional and meditative, and sometimes it’s over the top hot and horny.
Why would someone want a sex life make over?
Why wouldn’t they? A sexually satisfied person is a happy person. People take pride in having a good, healthy sex life.
Why do you think people need a spectacular sex life?
Great sex can re-boot a relationship, it’s a natural anti-depressant, and it’s good for your health. It can also be deeply spiritual. Let’s face it, life is full of stress. Spectacular sex can really help lubricate you through life.
What we all ultimately need and want is to be able to give and receive LOVE, and spectacular sex can help you to do that, either alone or with a partner. What could be more important than that?
How does one go about getting a “sex life makeover?”
I have developed a fourteen-step program. The first step is to makeover your mind, since a positive mindset is of utmost importance. Other steps include learning to speak ‘sexlish,’ confronting your inner ‘party poopers’ or the constraints that are holding you back, and creating a ‘sexpot profile,’ or a model for how to be after your makeover.
I also explain how to give your bedroom a make over—what to do to make it far more conducive to love making. One thing I learned as a sex worker is that you want to create a mood, something hard to do with pictures of your parents hanging in your boudoir, bad lighting and a television on in the background. And I share some key sexercises, such as ‘ecstasy breathing’. There’s also a step that helps you look and feel sexier.
What is your “Spectacular Sex massage” about?
It’s a very intense kind of erotic massage that puts you into really intense erotic vibratory states. I have taught it to hundreds of very happy campers over the past fifteen years. It consists of a series of genital massage strokes and techniques.
Each partner gets a turn to fully give and to fully receive. It’s highly arousing, and a terrific alternative to other kinds of sex, which can become too goal-oriented. You do strokes like Womb Drumming, Twist and Shout, and the Rosebud Massage. It’s the latest craze!
You have some innovative ideas about orgasm.
Yes, I’ve done a LOT of personal research about orgasm. People can easily learn to have many more types of orgasms. My definition of orgasm is ‘the pleasurable release, explosion or streaming of built up erotic or sexual energy, and it can occur in many different areas of the body in many different ways.’ For example, there are three basic categories; genital orgasms, energy orgasms and hybrid orgasms. Within those, there are further categories, for example, breath orgasms, megagasms, and dream-gasms. I highly recommend that people learn more about the incredible kinds of orgasms we are capable of.
What is a common blunder people make in their sex lives?
A lot of people criticize their bodies, their technique, and their partners during sex. A compassionate attitude and positive self talk during sex is perhaps the most important element to spectacular sex.
Also, people forget that there are many varieties of sex, similar to the varieties of food. There’s junk sex, health sex, comfort sex, and gourmet sex—people should be aware of everything on the menu and have a well-balanced diet. Balance spontaneous sex with planned sex. Balance giving with receiving. Balance intensity with subtlety. Balance rough with gentle. Often lovers hang out in the mid ranges and miss out on the full spectrum. Anyone can microwave a frozen dinner, but to be a gourmet cook, or a gourmet lover, takes learning, experimenting, some time, and practice.
How do you advise readers to make sex more spiritual?
It’s similar to watching a sunset. You can either watch a sunset very casually, or you can ponder its mystery and marvel at its beauty—which is the more conscious, present way. Like watching a sunset, sex will offer you what you put into it. So be more present during sex, and give it more conscious attention. But also surrender fully to it. There are great techniques you can learn that help you do this.
I heard you’re doing some creative things on your book tour?
Yes, I’m going to be doing a series of ‘Sidewalk Sex Clinics’- giving sex advice on city streets to whoever wants it-- for FREE! I’ll be set up at a table with two chairs on the sidewalk and will invite passersby to sit down for a free expert consultation. I’ve learned so much about spectacular sex and feel duty-bound to pass it along—it’s my public service.
Also, when I do signings, I don’t always just sign my name. Sometimes I “autograph” books with my left breast as a rubber stamp, leaving an inky ‘tit print’. It sort of symbolizes the fact that I wrote this book from my heart—as well as my brain and my clit. Plus it’s fun.
What is the best aphrodisiac?
Taking your time.